Fashion Icons of HORROR
Boo!
Did I scare you? Good. Happy Halloween! Spooky season is my favorite season so, naturally, horror movies and media are a huge part of my life.
It took me a while to figure out how to marry my first two loves: fashion and scary sh*t. I watched a bunch of horror movies, new and old, trying to figure out what exactly makes a villain like Michael Myers or Freddie Kruger so iconic. And then, it hit me: It’s the fashions! Michael with his grungy mechanic’s jumpsuit; Freddie with his cute lil Christmas sweater (Kelly Rowland may not have liked it, but I do); even Chucky in his overalls: You know who they are as soon as you see their outfits. We should all aspire to be so consistent.
From there, though, I wondered: why don’t we have more icons that could just as easily slaughter the runway as they do their victims?
Because they don’t have me as a stylist, obvi!
I believe everyone deserves to dress in a way that truly reflects them and their story, even vicious fictional murderers. Without further ado, here’s how I would style some of the most iconic horror villains of our time and (mostly) before.
Poor, poor Carrie White. Puberty is already hard enough without telekinetic powers you’re struggling to control and an abusive religious zealot of a mother. In a world where I’m Carrie’s stylist and also I’ve somehow already seen the movie Carrie, I’d take that bland dress she painstakingly sewed by candlelight and replace it with this gorgeous, asymmetrical and layered look with crystal heels. Of course, I couldn’t pass up this piggy shaped purse. Since I’ve already seen the movie, I already know the trick that’s about to take place, so, by including this cute lil nod to the impending practical joke, perhaps I can prevent it, and save some lives.
Or, it can just be a moment of foreshadowing. Whatever!
Ah, Leprechaun. Jennifer Aniston’s magnum opus, and, to this day, the only horror character to go to the hood twice. I love the Lep, especially as portrayed by Warwick Davis, but, (Carrie Bradshaw voice) a small part of me couldn’t help but wonder: What if Harry Styles played the Leprechaun, instead? He would most likely opt for a “gender bending” ruffled blouse, which would be perfect peeking out from this green and gold Siyu blazer. Maybe he’d skip the tights, but keep the cropped pants and update those Pilgrim-esque buckles with something a little more edgy with some ankle boots by McQueen. Most importantly, though, I think he would pick an even stupider hat.
Do we love Tiffany Valentine? Or do we love Jennifer Tilly? I know what we don’t love is this cliche edgy bride getup Tiff’s been rocking for a decade and a half.
I get it, it was pre-2000. All you needed to be alternative to the mainstream was black nail polish and lightly teased hair, but, if you wanna look the part of a punk rock serial killing doll in the 2020s, we’re gonna need to step it up a bit. This colorblocked half-black/half-white gown is the ultimate alt bride wedding dress, especially coupled with these stomping boots. Swap out that leather jacket that literally every girl in LA owns for this Rick Owens piece (Rick Owens doesn’t make garments, he makes pieces), and toss out that tacky amulet for these ornate fang necklaces. She can transfer her soul into them, instead, right?
Annie Wilkes was the first ever stan, even before the namesake Eminem song. And how did Paul Sheldon repay her? A brick to the face (sorry, spoiler alert).
After seeing Pearl this weekend (it’s fantastic and you should go see it even if you didn’t like X), I have a newfound understanding for the unhinged women in rural areas that don’t get to just hop on Tinder and take their neuroses out on unsuspecting finance bros like us city girls (period) so they have to find their thrills (and kills, and torture) wherever they can.
But just because you live in the middle of nowhere with nothing to do doesn’t mean you can’t look cute. I chose this denim Moschino dress for Annie: a major step up from her itchy looking jumpers. We’re layering the dress over this gorgeous turtleneck with statement (leg-o-mutton) sleeves, and adding a practical stomping boot. For outside endeavors like, idk, rescuing a famous author from an avalanche and dragging him back to your home to hold captive, we have a Burberry cape coat perfect for keeping you toasty with the added bonus of this red plaid print that harkens back to the flannels Annie and all the other farm fashionistas love so much.
Now, you know I had to save the best for last. The Final Destination series has sparked new fears of everything from tanning beds to pool drains to guys in elevators with a bunch of hooks, but, there is no more iconic horror than the log truck that set off the Rube Goldberg death machine of Final Destination 2. She simply is the moment. And yes, she does have a gender and she is a woman. Duh.
I kept this look to the earthiest tone (brown) and made sure to add a crinkled, “tree bark” like texture on the skirt, as well as some little flowers on the boots: After all, Miss Loggiana is a child of nature. Top it off with a coat by The Row and she’s a glamazon bitch ready to bounce her way onto best dressed lists and also right through your windshield and into your face.