I’ve never really been into letting others tell me how to dress, whether it be through dress codes, expectations based on societal standards, or the (not-so-quiet) judgement of others. In fact, I pride myself on breaking The Rules, and encouraging my clients to do so. I just don’t think anyone has ever developed a style they love based solely around what fruit their body is shaped like or the year they were born. I could be wrong. But I’m not.
But that doesn’t mean there’s no rules. I have a laundry list of them, like, “always wear a belt when you’re wearing something with belt loops” and “no white linen after 5pm if the temperature is lower than 65°F (18°C).” I would never impose those rules on you (maybe the first one, but only if you’re my client), but you won’t catch me breaking them. Yes, some of them are entirely arbitrary, but, that’s the beauty of personal style: it’s personal. You can (and you have my permission to) do whatever you want for any reason and you don’t have to justify it to anyone.
Sometimes, creating your own rules is about rewriting The Rules we followed in the past, and rewiring our style in a way that actually serves us. Things like “your waist doesn’t always have to be defined,” and “it’s okay to wear flat shoes to a fancy dinner.” Sometimes, creating your own rules is about establishing better shopping habits and keeping you from buying things impulsively that actually have no function in your wardrobe, like a pair of 5” heels when you teeter in wedges. And sometimes…your rules are just about looking as cool as possible, whatever that means to you. Like how I refuse to leave the house without at least two (2) necklaces, all six (6) of my everyday rings and a (1) pair of earrings lest someone look at me and think I’m not “effortlessly” stylish and excessively adorned.
If you’re working to build your wardrobe with intention, it’s important to set some parameters. For me, these parameters come in three forms: my overarching “Style Ethos;” my “soft rules,” which have a little room to bend; and my “hard rules” that must absolutely never be broken.
Let’s start with the easy one.
The Style Ethos
Naturally, I regularly encounter clients that have no idea how to “explain” their personal style. Even those of us who feel we’ve got a pretty firm grasp on how we prefer to express ourselves can struggle with what label to put on it (spoiler: it’s unnecessary, anyway). But, even if you can’t really slap a name on your overall style, you know your ethos.